Thursday, 21 April 2016


If you haven’t already, it’s likely that there will be a time when [without having done a damn thing to warrant such ill behaviour] you'll come across one, two, or even three people who [for the purpose of this post I will refer to as either 'Problem', or 'Problem Crew'] will try to break you – back you into a corner, highlight any flaws they can find, make you feel incredibly small and aim to have you perceived badly in the eyes of everyone around you. Here’s a number of reasons why this might happen…

  1. Your sudden ‘step’ onto ‘the scene’ knocks them off of their pedestal
  2. Your charisma draws others towards you and has 'Problem' feel as though they are being forgotten, or left out
  3. Your efficiency, tenacity, experience and ability to form a quick connection, or bond with those around you is unnerving for 'Problem' / 'Problem Crew'
  4. All of your ‘great’ qualities highlights their inadequacies!
  5. 'Problem' / 'Problem Crew' are just very bad at dealing with change...

Essentially though, what you are dealing with is a form of bullying. That said, 'Problem' / 'Problem Crew' probably wants to be your friend, if only they could deal with their insecurities and this you'll likely realise if, in addition to their attempts to bully you, they do one or more of the following….

  • Find any reason to talk to you about something relatable albeit in a passive aggressive tone
  • Agree with something they overhear you say to somebody else, even more so if you and the person you're in conversation with are having a laugh!
  • Offer to assist you, with the simplest of tasks, in the most overly, loud [yet insincere] manner they can deliver
  • Go out of their way for you without you asking to the point where you would be forgiven for wrongly thinking they may have changed their name to 'Extra Unnecessary Mile'!!

As challenging as these situations can be, mostly because, 'Problem' / 'Problem Crew' will usually cleverly display their horrid antics for your eyes only, the best way to handle the situation is to not take them on! Quite literally, you need to remain indifferent to any passive aggression, whispers, evils, snide comments, deliberate attempts to do nice things for you one minute then be nasty towards you the next and any other such negativity you may receive from them. It’s better to make a note of all that occurs. Do not make the mistake of playing a game of tit for tat as this will only have you then stoop to their ridiculously low level from which you may never be able to climb back up again. Doing so is likely to have folks see you in the very light 'Problem' / 'Problem Crew' is aiming for!!!! Furthermore, you’ve got to understand and empathise with those who are perhaps a little insecure because, if this is the case with 'Problem' / 'Problem Crew', it’s possible that, albeit wrong, they may not realise [entirely] what they’re doing!

The world is insanely small and these days it’s more like half a degree of separation than six!!!! Where you know you have not and are not doing anything that justifies the horrible way someone may choose to treat you, the best thing to do is to stay as you are, continue as you are and to trust who you are. If you can see the shady behaviour 'Problem' / 'Problem Crew' are throwing at you, there will definitely be at least one, or two other people who will also see what's happening which means they’ll understand the ill vibe is one-sided, real talk! Do not stress and maintain a positive outlook. 

If able to handle these circumstances with the occasional silent gripe, you might just want to pray for the strength to get through it however, from you feel as though you are being victimised, or made to feel uncomfortable etc, report it! Nobody has the right to make you feel such a way. Nobody!!!!

Sometimes it’s all about acceptance with understanding and tolerance. Nothing lasts forever. Other times you have to just ignore the situation - you’re above the petty, uncalled for, mean attitude being thrown your way plus, time changes everything!

None of us know who somebody we meet today may become tomorrow let alone where they have come from and none of us are invincible. 

God bless x

     Thanks for reading!
  Images above: Google
  Image below: Shining Concept, edited by C Jai

[useful tips on how to be at peace with the person YOU are! x]
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