BECOMING A MUM

9 months in my tummy, potentially the world of cravings, more aches and pains on top of those I already live with on a daily basis, nausea, possible frequent sickness, weight gain, stretch marks, fatigue, heightened emotions and the rest! See all of that I can handle.... The fact that, although we live in such a beautiful world, there are far too many horrid individuals living among us isn't something I can handle.

Not that I feel a need to justify my decisions but, I am so over being asked if I'm married and have any children, or when I'll settle down and start a family, followed by looks of utter disgust and disappointment when I reply with, "I have no intention of having a family of my own, thanks". Since when did it become compulsory? I've no interest in doing such things. In all honesty, the idea of getting married is absolutely fine although it would need to be incredibly low-key and inexpensive! 

Having kids of my own? Not so much. No way! I was aged 14 when I had a realisation that I do not want children of my own. 

Life provides no guarantee that you, or your loved ones, will always be safe and well. We can never know for sure if, when, or how we can protect those we love from experiencing awful things in their lives so, I've chosen not to place that burden or worry on myself any further by having children. The world is filled with far too much darkness for me to bring another human being into it who will, as a result of that darkness, have to go through way too many murky times. In addition to that, I just do not ever get that broody feeling when I'm around babies. I'm the one who will "coo", maybe hold them for a while and then smile real wide as I hand them back.

My mind is and has been made up for many, many years and while I frigging adore children so much, the role of auntie, occasional babysitter, youth worker etc., are more than enough for me. I get to contribute towards the positive and productive growth of our young people without becoming too emotionally involved or attached, and minus any long-term commitment to them that will profoundly impact my life indefinitely!

I think it is so wrong to try and make a woman [or man for that matter] feel as though they exist only for the purpose of reproduction and/or to imply that women above a certain age who are without a husband and children have less of a place in society, or within a 'social' circle. My position in this world has nothing to do with whether or not I have, or will have, a baby and everything to do with what I choose to contribute towards the greater good of the world.

Although I am really pleased for those who make the choice to do so, I do not want to bring babies into this world nor do I want the responsibility of raising children and that's that! The End.

Written by Charley Jai - @charleyjaiuk

All details and information correct and up to date at the time of publishing.