Sunday, 17 December 2017

I DIDN'T THINK I WOULD SURVIVE...

It's been a tough year. In one way, or another and, of course, with varying degrees of severity depending on one's circumstances, it has been flipping hard out here throughout 2017 for so many of us! Whether it was the end of a relationship, being let go from a job, poor health, financial strains, family feud's, the loss of a loved one, or, other grave experiences that we know to be occurring around the world, the last 12 months have been a tad dark at times to say the least.

CopyrightCharleyJai
Although I have been quite good at staying optimistic, like every other human being, there are times when I have felt that having a "you've got this" and "you can do it" attitude just hasn't worked for me. My mood has been low, energy levels practically missing, my mind has been all over the place and I occasionally felt 'done with the world'. I just felt lost, literally...

I had moments of feeling total despair, especially during October and November. For me, they are my reflection months; when I begin to look back on the year and check myself as it were. The response towards my personal growth was [fairly] decent [there will always be room for improvement], but, it was almost a wrap when I started to think about my creative endeavours because, I felt a bit "meh". Yep, I'm talking about blogging and radio!!

Suffice to say, a solid perspective was restored once I re-read one of my favourite books, by Oprah, titled 'What I Know For Sure'. See, what I know for sure is that I will continue to pursue whatever I remain passionate about until I draw my last breath, regardless of how well I may, or may not be doing, but, I'll not be hard on myself should that passion fade! 

"The struggle is too real" is a phrase I heard a lot during 2017 and, for me, it definitely was in a number of ways, however, I stayed focused on the things and people who make me happy and encourage me to keep striving! This, my friends, is not easy, but, it is achievable and a great way to rise above any nonsense. I also made progress with a big part of my anxiety - I, to a degree, started to speak openly about the things I was finding difficult. I absolutely loathe the thought that I may be a burden to someone and I have also had a real battle with letting folks in because, I haven't wanted to get close to anyone so as to avoid potential drama which may [inevitably] lead to a fallout. I praise God that I am much better at sharing the absolute truth of my feelings now [where necessary] and with the relevant people, organically. 

I'm proud of myself - I've done well with my anxiety, I achieved the goal of publishing a blog post once a week [that might change to once a fortnight next year] and I've managed to live a fairly 'normal' life despite constantly being in pain. I took a course in Photography, saved and bought for myself my first DSLR camera [and started a photography project], kept up with my exercise, I was chosen to host a big corporate awards show, which champions and supports our youth [Business Launchpad], launched my own clothing range in partnership with a charity, was rated a Top UK Blogger by Feedspot and successfully ticked off the majority of my vision board. I did alright, mate!

This year, one of my main goals was to use the platforms available to me to support others and I did that. I have always done that. Next year the goal is to focus on my own pursuits both professionally and personally. I need to look after myself before trying to look out for others. 
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This is my last blog entry, for 2017, as I now look forward to spending Christmas with my immediate family and I cannot wait! For me, the festive season is all about the children and they're the ones I am most excited to see open presents, nom on delicious food and have lots of fun. Who would ever believe that I was once a Scrooge? LOL!!

Be good to yourself, folks. When it comes down to it, you're all you've got.

Thank you so, so much for supporting this blog [to date, it has received 47,000+ views worldwide], my radio journey and all of my other endeavours. I hope to have your continued support throughout 2018 as I take on a new and very different chapter of my life. Merry Christmas and God bless x

Thanks for reading.

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PS. I will try to include a random fact about myself with each post throughout 2018!! 

9 comments:

  1. I absolutely love this post. It’s so honest and pure and I can honestly relate to this and my year I’ve had. You are not alone and so many of us can relate. Onwards and upwards.

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  2. Wow! Well done for all of your achievements this year Charley! I salute you for your openness, though 2017 had its challenges i hope it brought you understanding, I pray only success in all areas of your life shall follow. Enjoy your Christmas and holiday season and I pray 2018 brings you closer to your dreams. x

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  3. So inspiring. This has given me strength. Stay healthy, motivated and strong in the new year. Thank you for your genuine support. God Bless love Caroline and UNDR LNDN

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  4. I totally agree...really honest post & saying the things we feel but often don’t feel courage to say. There is so much strength in your story & I pray you continue to share it. Much love girl xxx

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  5. So much strength in this post. Your honesty encourage me (and I’m sure others) to be real about some of the low times we would rather not discuss. I pray you continue to be REAL and keep changing the world on blog post at a time. Much love girl xxx

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  6. Lovely post Charley. I'm so proud of you and the journey you have taken this year. Onwards and Upwards for the future and this new season of your life. Rooting for you always xx

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  7. Another great post sis, hopefully you will build off this complex year of 2017 and use it to inspire you into greater goals and desires for 2018 xxx

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  8. THANK YOU ALL for taking the time to have a read and to leave a comment, means SO much to me! Hope you each have a superb Christmas and a fab start to the new year x

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