Authentic life and lifestyle content that, albeit personal to me, can hopefully inspire you. There is no intention to offend.
Saturday, 26 July 2025
IF YOU KNEW I WAS ABOUT TO DIE...
Friday, 18 July 2025
CAN WE FIX THIS?
Living in this era feels surreal...
We have more ways to connect, yet we’ve never been more disconnected.
More tools to support one another, yet countless people still lack real, meaningful support.
More platforms to express ourselves, yet silence is often the default.
More children living in poverty, while millionaires are being made by the day.
More avenues for authentic love, yet much of it feels like a performance.
More jobs and opportunities, yet pursuing them can come at the cost of our mental well-being.
More people are single, yet, it seems, few are truly ready for loyal, lasting commitment.
More authorities than ever, yet safety feels scarce, justice elusive, and the systems meant to protect us are riddled with deep flaws.
Are we living in a dystopian world? Is this a preview of what's in store for children born today?
Some might say, “You’re being dramatic, Charley!” But others will understand that I’m not only someone who feels deeply — the things I’ve shared above are a reflection of reality.
The impact of what often feels like a world in constant pandemonium has shifted how I move through life. I spend more time at home than outside and, when I do socialise, I gravitate toward quieter, calmer spaces — crowded environments feel overwhelming.
I’ve become more guarded; more private about my life and choices. I no longer extend support as freely, especially to those who show no support for me. And I’ve stayed single — by choice — for years now, because I struggle to trust men in romantic contexts. Based on my experiences in recent years, there appears to be an epidemic of men in relationships who are constantly seeking something from women who aren’t the ones they’ve “committed” to. It’s so disheartening....
Maybe the apocalypse season made everything worse. Is that it? Is the apocalypse — COVID — to blame? Or had we already started down this path long before: becoming more selfish, self-absorbed, self-serving, fame-obsessed, money-driven, impatient, only 'supportive' of those we think we can gain something from, and increasingly void of empathy? Have we been morphing into these hyper-individualistic versions of ourselves for a while now?
This article is very much a stream-of-consciousness — an unfiltered, unedited spill of thoughts. I’ve laid them bare, just as they came, and I’ll leave it here.
Wednesday, 4 June 2025
UGLY DUCKLING
It's both surprising and reassuring to discover, while reading the comments under certain Instagram posts, that you're not alone in your struggles—whether it's your experiences, thoughts, aspirations, challenges with friendships, relationship issues, or everything that happens in between and around those parts of life.
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I find myself struggling to make sense of the times we're living in. While there are undoubtedly some incredible advancements, it's hard to ignore the troubling shifts that seem to be steering us toward an uncertain and possibly dangerous path. The direction the world is heading in feels increasingly frustrating and, at times, overwhelming. I worry deeply about what the future holds for children and younger generations.
I've been thinking about The Handmaid's Tale, Black Mirror, Time Cut, and similar projects. Are these simply the products of extraordinary imagination, or are they subtle warnings—a glimpse into a future that may not be as far-fetched as we once thought?
My generation [I was born 1980] grew up as the encyclopedia kids. We’d head to the library to borrow books, made phone calls on corded landline phones and many of us grew up on black-and-white television with just four channels—eagerly awaiting the much-anticipated launch of a fifth. To stay informed about our community, we relied on local newspapers. Sundays were especially quiet—hardly anyone on the streets unless they were going to and from church, or doing a food shop!
A lot of us would play outside on the weekends, or in our bedrooms buried in toys—Polly Pocket, Gameboy and Action Figures, for example. Returning to school was often exciting: catching up with friends, performing at school assemblies, playing double dutch, hopscotch, sharing laughter and playful banter.
Looking back, our childhood in the '80s and youth in the '90s were filled with some of the most beautiful and blessed moments—simple, joyful, somewhat carefree and full of connection.
We dealt with curfews, homework that often felt outrageously unfair (LOL), the drama of 'competing' for the attention of the popular crush, prepping for sports day and making sure we had the latest must-have Caterpillar boots or Dr. Martens. Weekend cinema trips were a treat, and friendship fallouts—usually sparked by gossip that almost never came with proof—were part of the landscape.
We were a generation that lived without mobile phones constantly in hand, free from the pressure to maintain a curated online presence—one that today often chips away at confidence, hope, and self-worth.
Back then, words like “trauma,” “anxiety,” and “woke” weren’t tossed around like custom-made confetti at weddings! Perhaps that's partly because our generation [especially Black and Brown families] was raised with an unspoken rule: what happens at home, stays at home. Did we even know about/understand, trauma, anxiety or realise a need to be 'woke'? In many cases, that rule meant not speaking about family matters with anyone outside the immediate household—including extended family!
This has caused many of us to experience the 'ugly duckling syndrome'—feeling ashamed about normal circumstances that others can relate to, misunderstanding ones place in the world and [in professional settings] being initially dismissed or overlooked; treated as 'less than'. Seen as timid or even difficult, only to later be regarded as someone with a surprising and powerful transformation once you have healed and broken generational patterns.

What might life—both then and now—have looked like if we had all been taught that effective communication is not only valuable but also essential, healing, and empowering? Imagine growing up in environments where parents, guardians, or caregivers encouraged open dialogue about our struggles and emotions. Were parents [back in the day] limited by what they themselves were taught, or were some complacent and dismissive instead of leading inclusive conversations? It's such a shame that in some households [that rule means] feelings and emotions are rarely addressed, let alone explored.
The phrase "be the change you want to see" comes to mind... But, if the majority are content with the status quo, or simply afraid to step away from an unhealthy norm they've become comfortable with, how much real change can occur with only a small number who are willing to lead said change?
Monday, 28 April 2025
REFLECTING ON THE TRAGEDY OF JOYCE VINCENT
Joyce's story resonated with me due to similarities to my own life. In December 2003, at age 23, I lived with my then boyfriend. By 26, I was single and living alone in a bedsit. Although I began a new relationship at 31, it did not last. Years later, celebrating my 38th birthday in Marrakech with a childhood friend, I never anticipated returning to the UK and watching that friendship, along with others, fade as I outgrew those going in different directions.
At 44, single again, with a small circle of friends, a new home and thriving in unexpected ways, I read Joyce Vincent's story and wondered, "Could this happen to me?". The answer is yes. It could happen to any of us... Despite numerous ways for people to stay in touch, many only reach out when they need something. How often do you check in on others just to see how they're doing, rather than out of necessity? We can become so absorbed in our own lives that we forget to check on those around us.
I think some people see me as a well-connected woman with plenty of social options, therefore assuming I’m always okay and don’t need anyone to check in. That mindset is why I, or anybody for that matter, could easily become a modern-day Joyce Vincent. I'm thankful for the close friends who do communicate with me regularly to make sure everything with me is okay, and vice-versa.
You cannot control whether someone loves you, or will love you on your terms. However, you can express your needs honestly. Even after those conversations, though, change can't be forced. Unfortunately, any of us—especially those who are alone—could pass away without anyone noticing, and that is a deeply sad reality.
Make it a priority to regularly and meaningfully connect with the people you truly care about. You can't give someone their "flowers" once they're gone! Equally, ensure you have boundaries in place to protect yourself from those who cause you harm without shutting out the ones with whom you have a beautiful connection and bond.
Wednesday, 26 March 2025
PRIORITISE YOURSELF AND FIND PEACE
Tuesday, 11 February 2025
MEN AND WOMEN CAN'T BE FRIENDS

Thursday, 23 January 2025
WHY EMPATHY IS IMPORTANT
Something they did, or said, perhaps an ongoing behaviour, or a u-turn on a mutual agreement, has caused tension to brew between the two of you, and your immediate reaction/response is defensive because you take their actions personally.
But, here's the thing...
Reflect on when and how you met that person. What were your circumstances at the time and what was the situation that led to you meeting each other? During the course of the friendship, were things always 50/50 or did you pour in more? How often were you there for each other? Are you realising that the friendship was one-sided, or have you concluded that (due to what you or they were going through when you met) one of you needed what the other was bringing and now you've outgrown the friendship? Even if what you have done to your friend, or what they did to you, is wrong, maybe it will serve you both to simply think about and acknowledge the lessons to be learned and then move forward without any conflict. Arguments bring chaos, things said that we often then regret, headaches, insecurities and more arguments!
"Life is short"—how many times have we heard or said that? Let it be your reminder to show your friend (and yourself) a little empathy. Afford them some grace, allow yourselves the space to process things so you can move on from the upset in a positive way and let go if that’s what feels right.
Regardless, be of the mindset that empathy is important and it starts with you.