How would you respond?
How would you treat me?
What would you say to me?
What would you ask me?
Is there anything you’d want to know?
Anything you’d feel the need to confess?
How would you truly feel if you knew our time together was limited?
How would it feel to know that, one day, we might never get another chance to reconnect?
What would be your first reaction or thought?
What would you want to do with me?
Is there something you’d hope to receive from me?
Is there something you’d want me to do for you?
Let me be clear—I’m not dying, not that I am aware of. But I’ve been in a really reflective mood lately. I’ve been thinking a lot about what I would say to someone I care about, if I knew it was my last chance to talk with them. Why can’t I have that conversation with them now—while they’re still alive? I can, and so I will, because, in the past I haven't and there has been some regret.
Do we really care?
Are we truly concerned?
Is the “I love you” ever genuine?
Oh wait... a lot of us are too busy when people are alive, aren’t we? Too busy chasing money, too busy chasing status, too busy chasing likes, too busy staying in relationships that aren’t 'the one' for us, too busy chasing popularity, too busy trying to keep up appearances, too busy trying to stay young/youthful, too busy with work, too busy wasting time on the wrong ones; too busy being busy with a lot of stuff that will never matter once we ourselves are gone.
But somehow, when they are dead, we find the time to post on social media, to attend the funeral, to express sorrow about the person and profess just how much we adored them. Doing the most 'in their name' when they can no longer see, hear or receive anything from us.
Why do so many people only show up, and only care, when it’s too late?
We should be giving “flowers” while people are still here, while we still have time. We know this! Life is unpredictable, any of us can/will die at any moment! There is no guarantee of tomorrow or that you or your loves will be here next week, next month or next year.
Death is but a heartbeat away.
I’ve learned (with a brutal lesson) that waiting for the “right” time, waiting for the "perfect" moment, waiting until we have everything figured out— a job, an achievement, an olive branch from the other person, etc., etc., is NOT it! Nobody can afford to wait. NOBODY. It’s now or possibly never. And for me, never is not an option!
Even if you don't believe you'll be heard, or you think the person does not want to hear from you, this is the one time I encourage you to be selfish albeit kind with your approach. Reaach out via whichever avenue you can and speak from a place of truth and release - let them know how you honestly feel about them, give them reasons (not justifications) for any hurt you may have caused, ask for the answers you've always shied away from pursuing and cover everything with the aim of leaving lighter and with peace in your heart.
With that said, I invite you (if you know, or have known, me personally) to, in-person or via message, say what you have always wanted to say to me but have previously chosen not to, with the understanding that this might be your last chance to do so.
Written by Charley - @charleyjaiuk
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